In the spirit of new series, The Pod is proud to bring you "Unintelligent Design," a new, weekly series exploring the mind blowing stupidity of selected biological adaptations.
Kind reader, take pity on the Weddell seal. A pitiable existence indeed. The solitary Weddell seal has the distinction of being the only year-round mammalian occupant of the Antarctic ice shelf. This point of questionable pride is responsible for shaving a good 40 percent off of the species' average life expectancy. Why? Because the dumb dears spend their wintry days constantly gnawing and re-gnawing on the crust of ice the periodically forms to cover thier beloved "breathing holes" in the antarctic floe. Chew, chew, chew--until your teeth are ground to so much frozen dust. At which point, the un-dentured Weddell seal promptly services the ecosystem by actualizing the posthumous materials re-cycling program that awaits all of us at the end.
An animal that gives up 15 or so years of life and embraces a life of tedious, deadly monotony to enjoy the freedom of sedentary existence in the coldest area on earth. Truly a testament to the glory and wisdom of the lord and the unquestionable genius of his creation...